


it's kinda bright outside (i'm still here)

by 3ghosts



Category: Final Fantasy XV
Genre: Canon Compliant, Fix-It, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-01
Updated: 2017-11-01
Packaged: 2019-01-27 20:55:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 979
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12590328
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/3ghosts/pseuds/3ghosts
Summary: When Ignis is seven and Noctis is five, Noctis tells him a secret.





	it's kinda bright outside (i'm still here)

When Ignis is seven and Noctis is five, Noctis tells him a secret.

It’s a curious secret, one that Ignis, even at his young age, knows Noctis will very quickly forget once he grows up and starts to meet new people.

When Ignis is seven, and Noctis tells him his curious secret, Ignis thinks it’s the most incredible thing he’s ever heard in his entire life, and it makes his cheeks puff up with pride and his eyes light up with a smile. And in that moment, just that split second, he’s okay with the fact that Noctis will never remember such a trivial thing. Noctis is the prince of a very large kingdom after all; Ignis understands that the secret will fade with time.

x

And maybe Ignis is right, because Noctis doesn’t remind him of this secret again, and three years pass before Ignis decides to tell him one of his own, when he turns ten and Noctis has just come out of his terrifyingly long sleep after the incident with the snake daemon. Ignis shares his own secret because Ignis knows it’s Very Important. Because he’d nearly lost Noctis, and Noctis has to know.

So Ignis tells him, as soon as Noctis wakes up and the king gives Ignis permission to crawl into the bed and lay there. He clings onto Noct, tries hard not to cry, and says it so many times. His secret. Over and over. And he falls asleep with the little prince at his side, his promise on his lips. 

x

Noctis loses his smile and his courage and the sparkle in his eyes when he comes home from the land of sylleblossom petals and mountain castles.

Ignis sees Noctis grow into a beautiful stranger, a shadow of the flighty prince he once knew.

And still, he keeps Noct’s secret with him, even if he’s quite sure his friend has probably buried it under layers of silence and heartache and the ghosts of a burning Tenebrae.

Still, Ignis keeps close, and he keeps Noct’s nightmares at bay.

x

When Ignis is older, when he begins his training in the Crownsguard, when he’s old enough to understand that their silly childhood secrets are going to cause problems if they aren’t laid to rest, he begins to treat Noctis more like a prince. And it makes it all the more important to do so, when Noctis starts to meet new people, when Noctis moves out of the Citadel and into his own space. When Noctis finds friendship elsewhere. 

Ignis keeps his distance.

Yet, he tries so very hard to keep their secret safe and alive, in ways that Noctis doesn’t understand.

He bakes and he cleans and he serves and he protects and he gives Noctis all the space that he needs, and he _knows_ Noctis doesn’t understand. 

He writes his reports, drives his prince to and from school, to and from the arcade, to and from the apartment. He gives his prince half-smiles when it’s safe to do so, makes Noct’s life as painless as possible, even if he can’t take away such things as the king’s ailing health or the looming destiny of Noct having to take his father’s place on the throne. 

x

Noctis doesn’t say anything. And things change. 

x

When Noctis is to wed the Lady Lunafreya, there is nothing but a resolved acceptance and a heavier silence. There is a big picture, and when Ignis stands with his prince through the death of King Regis and the fall of Insomnia and the mad destruction of Altissia and the loss of Luna and everything- 

the pain, the loss, the anger, the blood, the burning- the _burning_ -

_every single thing-_

Noctis finally tells him.

He tells him, just before they enter the chaos of Gralea: 

_I understand._

x

And Ignis knows Noctis does.

And Ignis doesn’t say anything.

They are seven and five again.

x

When Ignis is twenty-three and the world remains dark and the stars go out, there is nothing but the crushing weight of all the silence in the universe.

And it stretches for years and years until Ignis has to dig out their shared secrets from under deep layers just to keep him feeling sane through the endless night. 

x

When Noctis comes home at last, it is not a victory and Ignis knows it. There is a big picture. There has always been a bigger picture. And the gods have always wanted it to be complete.

And it is under the quiet of the dead sky that the both of them shed the silence and share new secrets. 

x

_Hey. Ignis._ He can hear the smile in Noct’s voice when he speaks. _I’ve got another one for you. Think you can keep it?_

And he cannot help himself.

_Of course, Noct. Always._

_Okay, good. Here it is._ _Here it is. Ready?_ Noctis is like the sun when he says it. Ignis sees him. _I still love you. Always have._

x

_I have one for you too, Noct, if you’d like to keep it._

_Can I scream it to the gods instead?_

_If doing so will make them let me keep you after tonight, then yes._

_Go for it, Specs._

And Ignis tells him. 

_I have never stopped loving you. And I never will. Even when the night is done._

_I know, Iggy. I know. I will scream it, I swear._

x

When Ignis feels the dawn spill across his face, it makes him feel an aching warmth he’s not felt in a long time. And through the soft sounds of his own quiet weeping, he hears movement. He hears the wet, choked gasps of astonishment. And at first he doesn’t understand. 

And then he does. 

_Hey. Ignis._

The voice comes out of the light, raspy and raw and sweet.

_One more secret. Just for you._


End file.
